AoL009: Ideas to Improve all the Tomorrows of your Life with Jim Vaughan

Gary Vaynerchuk, Pat Flynn, Tim Ferriss, even Tony Robbins. These are names that we can picture when we think about being successful in climbing their respective career mountains. We all know these names because they share, on a regular basis, how they got to where they’re at and what they’re currently doing. One thing that they all have in common is that they’re releasing new content all the time. That’s what makes them popular, I’m sure.

They all are people we’d consider to be extraordinary and able to give lots of information in how we can be great like them. However, the idea of being great and teaching others to be the same isn’t new. Would you believe that Tony Robbins wasn’t the first big self-help star out there? He had to learn from others… but who did he learn from? Who was popular in that time?

These were questions I continually searched when I first learned about the self-help field. I know Tony mentions a few in his books, but I always wondered if there were others that were popular at the time. If you know Tony’s story, you know that he started out pretty normal like most of us. So it wasn’t like he had special access to any insider information.

When I met Jim Vaughan in 2012, he helped shed some light on this mystery. With the site that he had at the time, I was able to go into this vast library and learn from some of these past rock stars of success. Some of those names included Earl Nightingale, Paul J. Meyer, Andrew Carnegie and others. These are people who he considers part of his Personal Board of Directors. These were people that I was sure that could have impacted Tony’s education!

And when I say education, don’t believe that what I’m talking about has anything to do with what you find in formal education. You know, K-12 and college. So much of that knowledge is a complete waste of time when it comes to actually being successful in life. I mean, outside of those who graduated with a STEM related major, it’s insane how many college graduates don’t have a job in the field they went to school for. However, I’m sure you know this. (Hell, you might even be one of those people. I feel your pain. I went to school for a STEM related major… and used it for a whole two years before I realized that it didn’t fit what I wanted to do.)

So, if you feel that you’ve been lead astray in your career (and life in general) and want to really learn from proven old-school life advice, I’d check out what Jim has to say. He’s been listening and implementing a lot of it for a good part of his life and is now dedicated to passing that knowledge along. It might just help you be the next Tony Robbins in your field.


  • Why Jim started listening to success masters and how they amplified his career.
  • How Jim got hired to do DJ work at the White House (yes, that White House).
  • How you can change your thought process to get to where you want in life.
  • What kind of impact Jim wants to make with his businesses.
  • How Jim came up with the idea for the IQ Morning Report and what it consists of.
  • Why he believes it’s so important to keep learning.
  • Some of the great tips he’s learned through the years including the easiest way to become a people magnet.
  • Proof that you don’t need a formal education to do well for yourself in life.
  • …and MUCH more.

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.



Here’s some popular YouTube videos and other media related to Jim’s Personal Board of Directors:

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunesStitcher, and/or Podbean. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!


AoL 007: Personal Branding: Not Just for Business Owners with Ryan Rhoten

When was the last time you cared about what you looked like? If you’re like most people, probably this morning before you headed off to the office. The image that you give of yourself is highly important. It’s all about first impressions, right?

So you know you should be aware of how you’re making a first impression in the real world. But what does the internet say about you? Have you done a search on yourself recently to see what comes up? If you have, and you didn’t like the results, how can you change that?

That’s where our guest, Ryan Rhoten, comes into play. Not so long ago, Ryan didn’t think about his online persona either. In fact, it wasn’t until he didn’t get a promotion that he wondered what what was going on. Soon, though, he realized that he didn’t look so good on the web. In fact, there were other Ryan Rhotens on the web… one of which that wasn’t too flattering.

Today, he helps others figure out what their stance is on the web. He does that by helping them hone their personal brand. Yeah, that same personal brand that many celebrities and business owners have to be aware of.

If you’ve recently been denied an interview or promotion that you thought was a sure thing, then you should listen to what Ryan has to say. Even if you’re a business owner and you’re not exactly sure you know everything about personal branding, you should definitely check this talk out too. It just might mean the difference between you getting that next job or client.


  • How Ryan got started as an online Personal Branding Expert.
  • Why he doesn’t consider himself a “entrepreneur” quite yet.
  • Why it’s important that you go to events when building your brand.
  • What’s an expert exactly and how you can find out what you’re an expert in.
  • What are common practices of recruiters of using social media to find talent for an open position.
  • Why Gen Xers naturally struggle when it comes to their online presence.
  • Some common mistakes people make when developing their personal brand.
  • Why it’s important to do things out of your comfort zone on a regular basis.
  • What a Klout score is.
  • …and much more

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.



Checklist for building your online presence on LinkedIn.


14-Point Checklist to Dominate Your Personal Brand on Google

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunesStitcher, and/or Podbean. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!


AoL 006: Helping Veterans Become Entrepreneurs with Joe Crane

Imagine you have been groomed to think and act a certain way for several years. Most of us have, it’s called formal education. Now imagine that you voluntarily signed up for this training to be part of something bigger than yourself? That you wanted to serve your country in the best way you know how? That’s what our veterans have done.

Now think back to when you first got out of school. I remember that it was a difficult time. I didn’t have the job that I was supposed to have. Nor did I have the network that I should have had either.

The same can be said for many of our vets as well. Many of them have lived a life that is cut off from the rest of society. The time that they do have off, they’ve spent with their family or friends. Why not? Their job at the time was pretty much 24/7 and they might have never seen those people again.

In today’s podcast, we speak with Joe Crane who is a veteran of the Marines. He spent over 20 years in the Marines as a Super Cobra pilot. Today, he is a commercial pilot, but while he’s not doing that, he hosts a podcast called Veteran on the Move.

Not only does Joe help fellow veterans adjust to civilian life, but he has a focus in helping those veterans become entrepreneurs. He believes that many of the skills that he learned in the military transfer very well to owning his own business, so he hopes that other veterans can see that in themselves as well.

Are you a veteran who’s wondering what your next step in life is? Or do you know a veteran who is kind of treading water after getting out of the military? Then check this session out and see if Joe can assist.


  • How Joe’s many transitions in his career helped him to see things differently.
  • Why Joe started podcasting in the first place.
  • How he helps people make the transition from being in the military to being an entrepreneur.
  • How he’s able to live a balanced life between being a dad, a pilot, and doing his podcast.
  • Why he uses SMART goes to get things done (check out session 5 for a definition of SMART goals)
  • What he feels the difference is between having a J.O.B. and being an entrepreneur is.
  • What skills he has obtained as a Marine which have helped him succeed as an entrepreneur.
  • His advice to those who just gotten out of school or the military who are struggling with their identity.
  • …and much more

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.



Are you a member of the military now or a veteran? Joe wants to let you know about a program that might be a fit for you to get ahead in your career. It’s called American Corporate Parters’ Mentoring Program. He and Brian have both been able to get mentors that are where they want to be in their careers. Personally, I’m a little jealous! Sounds like a really great resource. So check it out!

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunesStitcher, and/or Podbean. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!


How to Find Your Voice

Let’s start with a story by Brendon Burchard as he recounts his days as being a TA back in college:

I love this message. It’s one of my favorite inspirational messages about getting confidence in one’s self. After hearing this story, it’s so easy to understand how developing your voice can boost your self confidence. I know first hand.

Finding Your Voice Helps You Gain Confidence

There was a time where I couldn’t say a word in front of a classroom. In fact, it was hard for me to just read in class.

I was literally afraid of what people thought of me. If I made a goof up in my reading, I believed they’d think “Oh, that’s just John being John. What a screw up!” Little did I think about the kids who really were bad at reading but they didn’t care as much as I did.

Later, in college as I was starting to find myself, I was still petrified of what people thought. This was the new me. The real caring me. Sad to say, the more I cared, the worse I did. In fact, I’d say that Speech class, and the two times that I had to defend my major projects (senior and thesis in grad school) were times where I couldn’t help but be a deer in headlights. I knew my future was riding on it and I didn’t want to screw up. So, like anyone else that is seriously focused on their responsibility, I over compensated and did worse than I would have if I hadn’t had tried to be perfect.

After graduation, I became an algebra instructor a year later. There’s a couple things about that. First, I hadn’t had algebra in 7 years at that point. And second, I was still deathly worried about speaking in front of people. Let alone, a classroom of people. However, I always knew I wanted to be a teacher. So I had to deal with this problem.

In the end, teaching algebra for a couple of years taught me how to be myself in front of others. I believe that doing it repeatedly finally made me face my fear and deal with it. Was I the best? No. But was I able to break that “Deer in headlights” look? You bet.

How You Can Find Your Voice

You know, I’m sure there are other ways that people have found their voice over the years. But I just wanted to share with you how I was able to find mine while teaching algebra.

  • Accept that you have one. You know, many times I hear people talking about how no one ever showed that they cared about what that person had to say. This was the case in Brendon’s story. Well, John Maxwell has a saying that I think covers a lot of things, not just leadership. He says, “People don’t know how much you know, until they know how much you care”. This saying exactly reflects what Brendon did for his student. Likewise, when I focused on the fact that I had students that needed me to teach them how to do a certain skill to pass a class and the fact that they relied on me to teach them that skill, that’s when I started realizing that not only did I have a voice, but my voice mattered. If I did not realize that they relied on me, I probably would have been a horrible teacher.
  • Learn How to Be Present and Listen to the world around you. What do others say that you’re knowledgable about? What do others ask you about all the time? Knowing the answers to these two questions should help you realize that you have a certain subject and subjects that you can teach others about.
  • Realize that you know what you know. This was my major hang up. I focused so much on making sure that I knew everything and all the little questions that I wasn’t able to focus on the big picture – that people were comprehending what I was saying. Did people comprehend what I was teaching? It’s ok to not know the answer sometimes if it makes you more understandable. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be to convey your message in a way that resonates. It’s ok if your audience ask questions. It’s called feedback.
  • Be Relatable. Speaking of resonating, another part of having an impactful voice is to be authentic. I can tell you that if I was just regurgitating everything that was in the book, I probably wasn’t focusing too much on what the students were asking. So, I had to make sure that I was relatable. While I struggled at times, I found that the more stories or examples I used in class to explain a concept, the more likely the students were to understand what I was talking about. That said, how can you be relatable in your voice? In other words, how can you keep yourself from sounding like a robot?
  • Take Your Time. There’s a certain truth about things being rushed. What results have you had when you’ve been rushed? Some say that they do well under pressure. That might be ok with you. Personally, I know I haven’t had as good as results when I’m rushed vs not being rushed. Last week, we released a podcast about being proactive vs being reactive. Those who work reactively are more than likely being rushed to accomplish something. On the other hand, those that are working proactively do so in a more leisurely manner. Either way, when you take your time to get your message out, then you come across as being confident with what you’re saying. This will earn you more listeners.



If you really want to find your voice and figure out why people should be listening to you, try the above. You might not have a class that you can teach, but there are other organizations that will allow you to practice speaking. One of those is Toastmasters. There’s chapters all around the world.

Another idea would be to simply create your own group or meetup. As it grows, you’d know everyone that became part of the group. Or, if you don’t want to wait that long, you can join another one. As you get to know more people in the group, you might not be so afraid of them over time.

If you’re someone who recently was able to find their voice. We’d love to hear from you, too! How’d you do it? What steps did I leave out above that would help someone else build their confidence?

Top 10 Podcasts You Could Be Listening To (and 5 You Can Start On!)

Inspired by Cam’s video above, I thought I’d share with you all the podcasts that yours truly listens to as well. I mean, one of the things that we want to do in the newly created New Inceptions Masterminder group on Facebook is feature other people’s work. Not only does it build community when you promote others, but it also helps people find things they might not have known about in the past.

One of the things that LTD talked about all the time and that you might have heard is the phrase Leaders are Readers.

And I think that phrase has it’s merit. I believe to be a leader that you constantly have to be learning. When you’re learning, you’re moving forward. Likewise, if you’re not learning, you’re moving backwards.

However I believe that in today’s age many people don’t read as much as they used to. For example, while Facebook is full of text, it’s the videos that tend to go viral – not posts. For me, I’m naturally an audio person. I feel that videos and books must have your full attention to leave an impression. However, with audio (radio, podcasts, books on tape) I feel that you can be doing something (driving, walking, working out) and still be somewhat engaged in the material that you’re listening to.

So audio, I believe, is the one medium that every expert or online business person should be utilizing to build their audience. I’d imagine that podcasters would agree with this.


If you’ve never listened to a podcast, it’s never too late to start. Podcasts are generally free and can range in all kinds of topics, as Cam mentioned in the video above. I’ve been aware of them since I first had an iPod (2007’ish) but I believe they’ve been around longer than that. The reason you might not have heard too much about them is because they’ve been in somewhat of a rollercoaster of popularity over the years, but I think this current swing is a fairly large one.

So to help you get started (or maybe to just give you some more options), I’m going to share with you 10 podcasts that I’m currently listening to on a regular basis. And then, I’m going to give you my top 5 that I recommend that you should definitely add to your list whether or not you currently listen to them or are a newbie listener.

I will point out that I don’t expect you to listen to all of these all the time. Unless you commute daily and consider your car to be a mobile university, my recommendation would to pick topics that interest you.

The Top 10 Podcasts I’m Currently Listening To:

Smart Passive Income (Average Run Time [ART]: 45 minutes) – This is the first podcast that I ever started listening to. Over the years, Pat has done remarkably well with it. While I don’t visit his blog as much as I once did and don’t find myself regularly checking out his other material (which includes 2 more podcasts, a regular programmed YouTube channel, and “playing” around on Periscope), I do keep coming back to the original podcast. I think the main reason is his wide scope of guests that he has on the show. While he does manage to get big names on there from time to time (Gary Vee and Tim Ferris to name a couple), I think his real bread and butter is highlighting normal people who have successfully built an online business.

Solopreneur Hour (ART: 1 hour+) – Michael and his show recently came on the radar a couple of months ago when he was interview by Pat. I completely love his style of talking with people very casually. Just in the little bit of time that I’ve been listening, there have been HUGE bombs of wisdom dropped that I’ve used in either mindset or just getting things done. His background is definitely interesting in that he’s had big swings in his success. He’s killed it recently in the MLM world, but before that he moved from one place to another, struggling as he went. Oh and he loves his dog.

Joel Osteen Podcast (ART: 25 minutes)- This particular “podcast” helped me quite a bit when I lost my mom back in 2011. I was going through a transitional time in my life and having her pass just added to all the emotions of leaving college and entering “the real world”. While Joel might not be everyone’s cup of tea, I do think that certain people that are on hard times can be picked up by his inspirational message. Generally Maria and I will listen to this one together. (Also, there’s a video version of it as well as it’s simply the recording of his weekly televised show.)

The Charged Life (ART: 12 minutes) – Not as spiritual as Joel’s podcast, Brendon’s podcast is a quick message that he delivers about certain topics related to getting his listeners out of what he calls the “Caged” and “Comfortable” life. Like Joel’s podcast, there’s a video version of this one too which you can find on YouTube.

The Way I Heard It (ART: 5 – 7 minutes) – As being a fan of Mike Rowe since he started Dirty Jobs, I feel like I’m kind of in the same boat as him. Especially when it comes to how he is amazed by interesting people who do interesting things. This particular podcast was talked about during his interview with Tim Ferriss, and I thought I’d give it a go. Really glad I did! If you liked Paul Harvey’s The Rest of the Story, then you’ll love this – which is done in the same fashion.

Unmistakable Creative (ART: 55 minutes) – This show originally started out as the show which was geared pretty much towards to what Pat talks about. In fact, Pat had Srinivas, the host, on his show back in 2013. However, around the time that Srini was on Glenn Beck’s show, was when the podcast was changed to it’s current form. At any rate, I’m still a fan of Srini’s and love the guests that he has on here.

The Fizzle Show (ART: 1 hour) – Another podcast and group I heard about from Pat’s podcast. While I love Pat, having three hosts on a podcast sounded very unique to me. While this format works well on the radio, not many people have used it for pure podcasting – at least not with the ones I’m familiar with. It’s because of this show that we decided to go with format that we did for the Angles of Lattitude Podcast. (Also, remember, that you can get your first month of being a Fizzler for free by going through this link here.)

Art of Charm (ART: 15 minutes to 1 hour) – Jordan Harbinger and his pals started the Art of Charm as a coaching service to guys who wanted to be better men. For a long time, that was the focus of the show. However, as soon as I started listening to the show regularly in 2012-2013, they started changing the focus a little more on just finding out how interesting guests became their current successful self. I will say that if you’re anyone who needs to work on your self image or confidence, that this might be a show worth your time to listen to. Guests on the show include upper tier successes.

StarTalk Radio (ART: 50 minutes) – I think this was the 2nd podcast I started listening to. It’s funny, but Neil deGrasse Tyson is one of my favorite popular scientists in today’s pop culture. He was the 1st host of the recent Cosmos (there might be future seasons from what I hear) and he’s also known for his phrase “We have a badass over here”. So it seems fitting that he hosts a show (typically with a comedian co-host) where they talk with guests about pop culture and science.

The School of Greatness (ART: 5 minutes to 1 hour+) – Like many other podcasts that release multiple times a week, the School of Greatness by Lewis Howes has long shows and a short show on Friday. Personally, I picked his podcast up in 2013 when I heard that he had started it. Being familiar with him by him being Pat’s podcast (where else?) and talking about webinars and LinkedIn, I thought he might be interesting to listen to as well. Fast forward a couple of years and I think he’s more known for doing the show now than he was with those previous topics. Types of guests that he has on the show typically are pretty successful, but a lot of the time he tends to mix in some pretty good topic editions (those are normally his short ones).

My Recommended Top 5 Podcasts for the Podcast Newbie

If you’re just getting into podcasts, I wouldn’t recommend subscribing on iTunes to all of these just yet. Honestly, there’s a crap load of information coming from these folks and I don’t want you to get hammered with too much all at once. If you’re finding my list, there’s a good chance you have an interest in improving your career. So, what I’ll do for you is give you the ones I think would help you out the most in that quest. Then later on, you can come back and subscribe to the other ones I listen to for edutainment.

These are in order of how relevant they are based on where you might be in your career. The first three are for anyone while the latter two are geared more towards people who want to be experts in their field.

  1. Art of Charm – Basically just teaches people how to crush it all around – in their jobs, in their relationships, and in life. Jordan is very engaged with his guests which is interesting. You can tell he does his homework. He comes across as a fan of everyone he talks to.
  2. School of Greatness – Like the Art of Charm, however, Lewis lets the guest talk way more which definitely makes it a different show.
  3. The Charged Life – I think more people need to be aware of Brendon and what he offers. Ideally, at New Inceptions, we’re trying to help you move from a Caged or Comfortable life to a Charged Life as well.
  4. Smart Passive Income – I think it’s important that people know that there’s a way that you can make an income on the side using the skills that you already use day in and day out. While Brendon does that for a premium (he can, too – he shows you EVERYTHING you need to do to be a success in expert space) Pat shows you how to do it all for free. He’s also exposed so much of the world to me in general, that I couldn’t not post his show.
  5. Solopreneur Hour – I like his technique. It’s hard to say how much he actually researches his guests, but I think that adds to his style. He and Pat say that they don’t research their guests too much because they want to sound more authentic when finding things out. However, he does seem to know a lot about most of them. I like the conversation effect that this gives his show.


I’d love for you to check these out and let us know what you think. If you’re a podcast newbie, take a listen to my recommended top 5 and let us know which one sounds the most interesting to you. What did you like about them? What didn’t you like about them? If you were to make a podcast, what would you focus on? If you’re already a host, please let us know about your podcast below. Be sure to tell us why you started it and what your focus is. Let yourself be heard!

5 Steps to Meet New People at Live Events

“Be genuinely interested in everyone you meet and everyone you meet will be genuinely interested in you.”

― Rasheed Ogunlaru

If you’re an introvert, you’ve probably had instances of where you feel alone – even if you’re in the middle of a room of people. You look around you and all you see are others having a good time. You wouldn’t mind having fun too, but you don’t know anyone. To keep from looking like a loser, you play around with your phone or, better yet, start tinkering with any musical instruments that might be available. At the same time, you might be wondering, “How did I get here?” and “How do I get out?”. And, to be honest, you’re not alone.

Funny enough, all people are social. It’s part of being human. Otherwise you wouldn’t have come to this event. The catch is that some people are social in a different ways than others. Introverts, by our very nature, tend to have just a few key relationships at any one given time. However, there are times where we need to expand our horizons and meet other people that might be new friends… or, better yet, help us move on in life.

So here’s the million dollar question. How do you meet people at live events? Below is a 4 part strategy I’ve used to meet interesting people at events that I have gone to in the past.

Get Your Mind Right

Whether you’re at a job fair, a party, or a networking meeting, there are going to be people you just don’t know. But the thing is that everyone you know now besides your family are people at one time you didn’t know – (even your gaming group if you’re a gamer). How did you become friends with those people? More than likely you shared something in common. The people who are around you at this event, what do you share with them in common? That’s where you can start the conversation.

Also, there’s a good chance that other people there are introverts too and they’re just as scared as you are in reaching out. The problem is, you won’t know immediately who those people are. So it’s best to just think of all of these new faces as being just as worried as you.

Before moving onto the next part of the strategy, I want to note that just because you’re there for a certain reason doesn’t mean that you have permission to interact with people based on that permission. In fact, you probably don’t want to. Most people can sense when others want to take advantage of them. So the idea is that you don’t want to go into meeting people thinking that you’re going to get something. That type of thinking will more than likely backfire. Instead, think of yourself as a co-host of the event. You’re just there to make sure everyone has a good time. Genuinely care about those around you. Introduce people to other people. Or if you know of a tool or trick that can help someone else, teach them about it. If you can’t care about those around you, you might just want to rethink about the reason you’re there.

Make a Plan

The truth is that you’re probably not going to know everyone at this event, but that’s ok. If you’ve ever gone to a job fair, you know that it helps to research companies that are going to be there. However, not all events are job fairs, and not everyone is a recruiter. So how do you prepare?

Depending on the event, there’s a good chance you might actually know one person: the host. Even if you don’t know the host, they’re the easiest person to find out information on. So see what you can dig up on them. That’s the first thing.

The next thing you could do is email them or any other people who are putting the event together. See if there is anything you can do to help set up the event or just help in general. Even if it’s a party or cookout, helping with the keg, cleaning up, or simply helping move furniture would be appreciated.

As mentioned before, you might want to act as co-host and make the actual host’s job easier. Ask them if there’s anything you can do during the event. There might be a couple of people that might need to be paid more attention to or there might be a position that could use assistance. If the host doesn’t have anything for you, simply be interested in what others are doing and up to. Act the part of the co-host anyway. Ask if you can get them anything, help them with anything, or simply be friendly. Whether or not you’re given things to do by the host or you just play the part, you’ll get the chance to meet some interesting people AND you’ll have purpose for why you’re engaging with them.

Be Present at the Event

So the big day has arrived and you’re on your way to the event. Time to get friendly, right?

Wrong. Actually, you should have started getting friendly before this point. One thing I do on the day of event is make sure that I’m loaded up on caffeine and talked to anyone about anything that day. Get the awkwardness out early. In fact, I try to have talked to at least 5 people before I go to the event just so my mind is awake and I’m receptive to whatever might go on at the event.

Having problems chatting with people? Trying to overthink your entry banter? Don’t. Instead, think of a simple acronym: F.O.R.M.  This stands for Friendly, Occupation, Recreation, and Message.

  • Friendly – Just take a stab at the weather or compliment something that the person is wearing. Find out what brings them to the event.
  • Occupation – Ask them what they do for a living. People love talking about what they have to think about all day. Feel free to ask about how things work or why they enjoy doing that particular job.
  • Recreation – They can only talk about work for so long, however. Ask them about what they like to do for fun. Find out what they like doing with their family. You might luck out and have something in common there. Just make sure you’re not drilling them with question after question.
  • Message – If this person sounds cool, then perhaps it might be a good idea to get to know them further.  “Hey, if you’re ever in the area, we should play a round of… ” or “Hey, I’d love to pick your brain about…” or even “Hey, the next time you’re in town, I’ll show you around.” People love to be invited to do things or to get to talk about their journeys. If none of those are good requests, just let them know what you’re looking for and let them know you’ll be in contact as well about what they’re looking for.

It doesn’t have to be genius talk. But don’t be a robot and do it with everyone, change it up a little bit. Also, for bonus, if there are business cards being passed out, feel free to write some notes on it about them.

Another thing you can do is smile. When people look your direction, just a grin and a nod will do. Smiles are contagious and they show confidence. However, just make sure you don’t go overboard.

If people are a little reserved, be reserved with them. As an introvert, you should have this part down!

Of course this all doesn’t matter if YOU’RE NOT PRESENT. To be truly present is to make sure you’re giving the person you’re speaking with all of your attention. Listen and hear what they’re actually saying when you’re engaging with them. In fact, now would be a good time for me to mention that you never know who a person knows. At any one time, you might be one person away from having your world turned upside down (for the better). So make sure you’re in the moment.

Follow Up

Was there someone that you truly connected with at the event? If so, you need to reconnect with them in 24 to 48 hours. This is Networking 101. Best way that I can think of doing this is by following up with some sort of link or article that might help with something that they mentioned. If you don’t have anything to offer, just send a message saying it was nice to meet them. If you wait longer, there’s a good chance that it might never happen OR they might have forgotten you.

If they really changed your perspective on things, feel free to go for the mentions on Social Media, or if you have a platform, feel free to write about them there too!

Be Unforgettable By Being You

Finally, I’ll say that to be remembered, you need to be you. If you’re talking with someone that you look up to or you think might be looking down on you, don’t try to be a Puffer Fish. Being someone you’re not will inevitably blow up in your face.

If you’re worrying about what to say in person, write in a followup, or do… Stop. Just care about who you’re engaging with. In the end, we’re all going along the same path. Go for authenticity. Just say hi, introduce yourself, and go from there.


The next time you hear yourself wanting to meet new people, whether it’s for a new job, to find new clients, or just to gain new friends, feel free to use these tactics. The more you practice these 4 steps to engage with people, the easier it will become for you to talk with others in the future. Remember, this is simply a framework to get you out of your shell at first. There is nothing wrong with changing the game up a bit or seeing what works for you.

Chime in below with your results or if you’ve recently figured out how to engage with people let us know what worked for you.